After getting dumped, the last thing you might think to do is try to glean something positive out of a breakup. Most people associate negative emotions with a breakup, particularly if they were the one who got the boot. It's hard not to ruminate about what went wrong, replaying it over and over in your head. Resentment, anger and guilt usually accompany a breakup – but they don't have to. What if you could replace those feelings with ones of empowerment, gratitude and freedom? It's not easy, but it's not impossible to turn your breakup into a positive experience. Here's how. After being in the mindset of the ex being "the one," it may seem hard to envision life without him or her, and that's understandable. Allow yourself to feel the grief, but don't prolong it. Consider a to-do list regarding your new life without your ex. If you lived together, this may entail finding a new place to live, new furniture, establishing your own credit, separate bank account, etc.
Even creating a new or reactivating an old online dating profile might help you make a clean break. Once the to-dos are crossed off the list, take emotional inventory. You may feel unsure of yourself and unable to trust your own judgment – after all, wasn't he or she "the one"? If you struggle with these thoughts, then a therapist may be able to help you work through them. An impartial third party can help you sort through why the relationship didn't work and shift the blame you feel from yourself to your ex and the dynamics of the relationship. If you can't talk to someone about it, write down your feelings. Write down the positive and negative aspects of the relationship. You may find that you take away a more objective, positive view of the relationship. The lessons you learn about yourself and your experience will go a long way in making things better the next time around.